Ike Turner shops at Sam’s and other stories

The other day was our bi-weekly Sam’s excursion. While we were waiting our turn to check out, we (and everyone else within 3 lanes of us) witnessed the guy in the next lane over from us picking up a bag of Ghiradelli chocolate chips from his cart and yelling at his wife “What the hell is this?!”. She mumbled something that apparently was halfway acceptable and he threw the bag on the conveyor belt. He kept muttering, though, and his wife and two children (yeah…not bad enough he treats her like that at all…but in front of their children and in public. He’s a prize.)walked away toward the exit to wait for him there I guess. He then asked the cashier how much they were, and although I didn’t hear her answer he says to her “Jesus Christ – I’m paying that much for her ass to get even fatter?”. I told the Postman if he EVER talked to me or about me that way I’d be gone so quick he wouldn’t even see my dust. Jackass. Why, why, why do people stay in relationships like that? It’s sad.

Shifting gears: The Diva had an orthodontist appointment this past week. She’s already had one round of orthodontia, now we’re looking at about 2 more years. On the window sill of the room we were in, there were several models of braces that are available. The technician picked up the invisible ones (the kind worn on the inside of the teeth) and said “Miley Cyrus wears these – they are the Cadillac of braces.” The Postman said I should have asked her to show us the Yugo model next since that was most likely the one we would go with. He always comes up with the good responses.

Shift again: The Captain has developed a new talent. He can imitate people. Well, cartoon characters and one human. But still…impressive for 9! The best part is he does them really, really well. It’s kind of cool.

Shift: One of the fundrasiers for the Diva’s class trip was tonight – a spaghetti supper. I’ve been dreading it all week. An evening with the Stepfords. I even dreamed about it last night. I dreamed all the Stepfords showed up in pink ballgowns and tiaras. I was pissed off at first that I didn’t know that was expected…then I realized it was fine because the patrons would easily be able to tell the normal people from the Stepfords – as though it wasn’t already painfully obvious. Thank goddess my friend J and her daughter were on set up duty with me and the Diva! We kept each other grounded.

Lastly, and most importantly: The Postman’s father is back in the hospital. They are doing a lung biopsy tomorrow. One doctor thinks, based on a CT scan, that it is lung cancer. The other doctor involved thinks it is just an infection or bacteria. In addition to the biopsy, they are going to scrape some mucus out (I know – gross!) to culture so they can definitively say it is one or the other. Please do whatever you do (pray, good thoughts, positive energy sent our way, etc.) tomorrow for us. I, and our family, would appreciate it!

Bad is never good until worse happens. ~Danish Proverb

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